fixing your life

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/daliah-merzaban/how-to-pray-five-times-a-day_b_1103662.html

Daliah Merzaban

Middle East journalist and analyst

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How To Pray Five Times A Day With A Busy Work Schedule 

Before I genuinely began to cultivate and nurture my relationship with God, I regarded the five daily prayers that Islam enjoins on believers as laborious. It seemed impractical to expect that I would be able to stop what I was doing during my busy work schedule to take time out and pray.
Working as a news wire journalist, I was often spending upwards of 10 hours a day in the office or at conferences, interviews and meetings, barely able to make time for a lunch break. If I wasn't working, my time was divided between house chores, errands, family and friends, and exercise. I was punctual with everything in my life, except that I was late five times a day.
In my mind, it was not viable to expect that I could wake up before the crack of dawn to pray the early-morning prayer, fajr, otherwise I would be too tired to work effectively later that morning. It also seemed inefficient to interrupt my work meetings to pray duhr, the mid-day prayer, and asr, the afternoon prayer.
Making the sunset prayer maghrib was often a challenge because the window to pray is typically quite short and coincides with the time between finishing work, having dinner and returning home. So, in effect, the only prayer that was feasible for me to pray on time was isha, the evening prayer. For most of my life, thus, I would at best pray all five prayers in the evening, or skip prayers here and there to accommodate my immediate commitments.


Women pray at Prophet's Mosque in Medina, Saudi Arabia, Mandy Merzaban photo Without realising it, my inconsistency and approach to praying trivialised the principle behind performing prayers throughout the day. I believed in God and loved Him, but on my own terms, not on the terms very clearly set out in the Quran and Prophetic teachings. Yet praying the five daily prayers, at their prescribed times, is the backbone of being a Muslim; we cannot stand upright in our faith without them. It is one of the essential practices that God has called on those who endeavour to live in Islam, a state of existence whereby a human strives to live in submission to God.
When I came to truly understand the importance of prayer, the realisation was both overwhelming and quick. It dawned on me that if I was not fulfilling this precondition, then I really could not claim to be Muslim. Even if I desired to have a solid connection with the Almighty I was not taking the necessary steps to do so. I promptly reoriented my life and it has now been a year and a half that I have not intentionally missed a prayer time, whether I am in the office, mall, grocery store, out with friends or travelling.
Looking back, I see how wrong I was about the impracticality of Islamic prayers, which are succinct and straightforward notwithstanding their resonance. When I moved from trying to fit prayers into my life to fitting my life around my prayer schedule, I instantly removed a great deal of clutter from my daily routine. Since regular prayer promotes emotional consistency and tranquillity, I began to eliminate excess negativity and cut down on unnecessary chitchat, helping me be more focused, productive and patient.
Over a short period of time, what amazed me was how easy and fluid the prayers became. Performing the early-morning prayer actually gave me a burst of energy during the day and, gradually, the prayers that I had initially perceived as cumbersome became an essential facet of my routine. With God's help, I would find ways to make a prayer regardless of the hurdles. While in Canada for the summer, I would often catch duhr prayer in a department store fitting room, with the help of a handy Islamic prayer compass application on my Iphone.


"'Verily the soul becomes accustomed to what you accustom it to.' That is to say: what you at first burden the soul with becomes nature to it in the end."
This is a line drawn from a magnificent book I am in the process of reading by great Islamic thinker Al-Ghazali, entitled "Invocations and Supplications: Book IX of the Revival of Religious Sciences." Al-Ghazali describes a series of formulas, drawn from the Qur'an and Hadith, which we can repeat to help us attain greater proximity to the divine and purify our hearts.


Women gather for prayer outside the Prophet's Mosque in Medina, Mandy Merzaban photo At each turn in my quest to enrich my faith, I have found that what at first appears difficult becomes easy when performed with sincerity. Soon after I reoriented my life to revolve around prayer, the five prayers felt insufficient in expressing my devotion. I examined Hadith, or the traditions of Prophet Muhammad, peace and blessings be upon him, and discovered there were optional prayers I could add to my routine. Since then, I have not let a day pass without praying them.
To supplement my prayers, I have integrated various zikr, or remembrance and mentioning of God, into my days. Zikr, including repeating such phrases as "la illa ha il Allah" (There is no God but God), habitually draws our attention back to God.
Among the many rich invocations mentioned in Ghazali's book is this one which I have started to incorporate. As we leave our houses each day, if we say "In the name of God" (Bismillah), God will guide us; when we add "I trust in God" (Tawakalt al Allah), God will protect us; and if we conclude with "There is no might or power save with God" (La hawla wa la quwwata illa billah), God will guard us.

I suppose to an outsider, these acts of devotion can appear a bit obsessive, and I have had a couple of people say this to me. Yet it is an obsession with the greatest possible consequences that can improve rather than disintegrate one's disposition. The more time I devote to God, the greater the peace of mind I find filling my life and the more focused I become on what is important -- such as treating my family and friends honourably, working hard in my job, giving charity with compassion and generosity, and maintaining integrity.
Remembering God throughout the day, through prayer and invocation, truly does polish the heart as Hadith teaches; you erase obstructions that would impede faith in its purest form.


"Truly when a man loves a thing, he repeatedly mentions it, and when he repeatedly mentions a thing, even if that may be burdensome, he loves it," writes Ghazali.

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Hepi 1 year old MYVi

lama juga tak coret sesuatu dalam blog nih, makin lama makin malas pulak. bila nak tulis, terbantut sbb sentiasa diganggu oleh anak2 tersayang...maklumlah nak attention dr ibunya.

pada bulan lepas, kita semua menyambut sambutan raya haji aidiladha, dan tidak seperti tahun2 sebelumnya, raya tahun ini agak berbeza buat saya sekeluarga. pada tahun lepas, disbbkan saya tidak mempunyai cuti yg banyak, maka raya haji disambut di kampung saya di Lenggeng. pada pagi raya pertama, kami membuat keputusan utk membawa anak2 melihat sendiri proses qorban yg dilakukan di jalan utama taman kami. dilihatnya lembu2 itu tenang dan pasrah sementara menunggu giliran utk disembelih. setelah leher mereka dikelar, mereka berbunyi mengeluh namun akhirnya tumbang kr bumi utk menjadi sumber makanan kita. anak lelaki saya sibuk seronok melihat lembu2 itu, saya pula termenung sejenak memikirkan betapa indahnya peraturan Ilahi kerana dijadikan binatang2 ternak ini jinak agar mudah utk dijadikan sumber makanan. di mata lembu tersebut, dilihat satu perasaan redha dan pasrah dengan ketentuan Penciptanya..

tahun ini, kami sekeluarga menyambut malam raya di lenggeng. tiada qorban dibuat tahun ini, kami sekeluarga membuat keputusan utk membuat tahlil selepas solat sunat raya dan kemudian brunch di rumah salah seorang makcik saya yg terletak berdekatan dengan surau/ madrasah datuk saya. tahun ini berbeza kerana kami kehilangan 2 orang penting dalam keluarga kami iaitu nenek dan makcik saya ( yg merupakan seorang pakar kanak2)...saya juga tidak cuti lama utk kembali ke terengganu kerana tak merancang cuti dengan baik jd dpt cuti sekejap je.

seperti tajuk di atas....bulan lepas juga, sudah genap setahun MYVi saya bersama2 saya. walaupun usia MYVI saya tuh bukan setahun, bahkan lebih dua tahun usianya, dia baru bersama2 saya dalam setahun sahaja.

setahun yg lalu , jenuh juga saya nak mencari kereta.. pd awalnya nak cari ketika saya di posting Kecemasan kerana saya kerja syif, jadi agak sukar utk suami menghantar mengikut masa syif... namun, lama kelamaan, kami sudah biasa dengan rutin itu lalu proses mencari kereta itu tertangguh. tapi di akhir posting tersebut, kami membuat keputusan utk mencari juga kerana takut2 bila saya dah MO nanti, saya kena dihantar tmpt kerja yg lagi jauh dan menyukarkan utk saya carpool dengan suami. suami saya kata saya kena praktis bawa kereta, nanti kalau lambat2, (last minute), kelam kabut pula. lepas survey2, akhirnya saya berkenan dengan MYVi yg saya pakai sekarang ni. sebabnya, tuan dia dulu menjaga dia dengan baik, keadaan kereta sangat memuaskan, dan bila memandu juga rasa selesa dan sedap, servis pula mengikut masa. keadaan luaran dan dalaman kereta bersih dan berkilat, tuannya dulu sentiasa membasuhnya. jadi ketika saya di posting paediatrics (posting akhir saya), saya pon banyak2 berlatih membawa kereta. nasib baik praktis, tengok sekarang kena "campak" ke seremban. masa pertama kali membawa kereta ke seremban, takut tak ingat punyer, ketar2 kaki saya sampai nak kejang kerana lama sangat tekan pedal minyak, walaupun bawa kereta automatik sahaja. almaklumlah, tak pernah bawa kereta utk jarak jauh dan jangkamasa lama. bulan pertama saya agak stress sehinggakan sentiasa diserang sakit leher dan bahu dan saya hampir2 putus asa kerana dek kepenatan. rasa mcm nak pindah balik. nak nangis. namun suami suruh saya bersabar, dia kata nanti lama2, saya akan biasa lah. tapi memang betul, lama kelamaan, saya menjadi biasa kerana ia sudah menjadi sebahagian dari rutin kerja saya setiap hari. sekarang nih dah 8 bulan di seremban. cuma......kadang2, saya kesian kat kereta saya sbb saya tak sempat nak basuh dia...sbbkan dia warna putih, jadi nampak comot.

sehingga sekarang, saya sangat terikat (attached) dengan kereta MYVi saya kerana dia telah banyak berjasa kepada saya dalam tahun pertama ini. saya sentiasa berharap yg kereta saya ni akan terus berjasa kepada saya. SAYANG MYVI!!!

ni gambo contoh je...kete aku comot sket haha

memori mak cidah

ini adalah sajak nukilan arwah makcik saya sendiri buat anak kembarnya di hari jadi mereka yg ke 18.

Nukilan untuk Ana dan Iya dari Ibu

23 november 91 mengimbau kembali

Rentetan sejarah tercatit kini

Gelaran ibu anugerah ilahi

Puteri nan kembar bak bidadari

Lahirmu penuh tanda tanya

Kehadiran dua mu tidak diduga

sayup suara tangisan pertama

Bahagia ibu yang gundah gulana

Hadirmu berdua membawa cahaya

Mengisi kesunyian jiwa yang lara

Syukurnya ibu tiada tolaknya

Hendak ku tangis tiada suara

Syukurnya nenda mu bukan kepalang

Keraguan di hati segera hilang

Sangkakan satu dua yang datang

Pemecah tradisi si anak minang

Putih kulitmu bak telur dikupas

Keayuan wajahmu pandang tak puas

Bisikan azan di telinga dilafaz

Moga awalan mu tak tercemar balas

Kaulah permata buah hati ibu

Dirimu dibelai umpama ratu

Kasihnya ibu tiada sekutu

Mendidik dirimu tak kenal jemu

Amanah tuhan semesta alam

Keatas ibu siang dan malam

Kasihku baja sayang ku siram

Moga jiwamu tak di intai kelam

Anakanda berdua belaian jiwa

Nasihat ibu bukan bersahaja

Datang dari cebisan rasa

Berlandaskan fakta serta agama

Pastikan dulu arah tujumu

Tanamkan azam tekad di kalbu

Kekuatan dan keyakinan sudah bersatu

Gelombang yang datang gentar teraju

Dengarlah sayang ibu berkata

Di atas tinta curahan rasa

Hati keruan berdebar dada

Risau nasib mu di hari muka

18 tahun cabaran usia

Pancaroba datang tak kira ketika

Jangan kamu lalai dan juga alpa

Moga remaja mu mekar berwarna

Dewasa kamu gelisah menanti

Bimbang bencana menerjah diri

Doa ku pohon tiada henti

Jangan maruah dipandang sepi

Wahai puteri ku cahaya mata

Selami keluhan hati ibunda

Nasihat ibu pantang didusta

Kelak dirimu akan kecewa

Sekian kali mendengar bicara

Kepercayaan ibu jangan di noda

Jauhi sikap tipu dan dusta

Sejahtera hidupmu dimaya pada

Berdiam diri bukannya sudi

Gerak langkahmu ku kawal rapi

Dosa dan noda jangan dicari

Binasa hidupmu membakar diri

Andai kau tewas tanpa diduga

Hancur hati ku penawar tiada

Kemaafan ibu usah dipinta

Umpama tenggelam timbul tiada

Pabila ibu anakanda khianati

Kesan nya dasyat tidak terperi

Akan ku tutup hati nurani

Derita ku bawa sampai ke mati

Berperi ibu bukannya benci

Menyiksa dirimu jauh sekali

Harapan hati menggunung tinggi

Matang berfikir jangan bermimpi

Sayang pada mu tidak terperi

Sanggup ku gadai nyawa dan diri

Sabarnya ibu terbatas tepi

Berputih mata rela kau pergi

Ana dan Iya buah hati ku

Pada mu berdua ibu berseru

Cekerawala batasan ilmu

Terokai ia jangan kau jemu

Taburlah bakti sepenuh jiwa

Untuk agama, bangsa dan negara

Jangan balasan diharap pinta

Syurgawi pasti buatmu di sana

Noktah kehidupan sudahlah pasti

Ayah dan ibu mu tidak terkecuali

Saat dan ketika mengundur diri

Airmata dibuang jangan sekali

Perjuangan mu anak ku belum berakhir

Pemergian ibu memang di takdir

Panjatkan selalu doa dan zikir

Mudah urusanku penangan bibir

Tinta keturunan pantang digadai

Bak pantai indah dilanda badai

Bergegar bumi ikatan terlerai

Salasiah nendamu pastikan bersemai

Indah namamu manja bak puitis

Mewarnai maya umpama perintis

Harapan Ibunda kaulah waris

Penyambung warisan minda yang arif

Lanjut usia mu doa di pinta

Bahagia hidup mu lindungan Esa

Anakanda berdua belaian jiwa

Berjuanglah kamu bagai satria

Duhai puteri ku tambatan sukma

Pesanan ibu jadikan pusaka

Kemenangan dijulang sedetik masa

Namamu dikenang selama lama

Berakhir sudah gurindam rasa

Cetusan hati ayah dan bonda

Buat pedoman anakanda berdua

Untuk menempuh alam dewasa

recall dua bulan

salam kembali... sudah lebih 2 bulan saya meninggalkan persada blog saya. banyak yg ingin dicoretkan namun hanya tinggal di dalam kepala sahaja, nak menaip tu terasa berat sedikit. lama2 idea2 yg ingin diceritakan tu sudah musnah dan hilang begitu sahaja. dan semuanya kembali kpd alasan yg sama iaitu SIBUK dan MALAS. sejak tamatnya Ramadhan tahun ini, saya seringkali dilanda kemalasan dan kepenatan. tak tau mcm mana time bulan puasa harituh saya kuat bertenaga utk terus memasak etc tp lepas2 tuh, semuanya terasa MALAS. memang benarlah bulan puasa ni mendidik disiplin, saya rasa disbbkan disiplin, saya mampu dan tegar utk terus memasak, menjahit di waktu malam walaupun sebenarnya kepenatan.

Raya tahun nih bercampur baur...pd awalnya saya merasakan ianya meriah kerana pd tahun ni, kami bercadang utk sedondon, saya dah jahit beberapa baju dan kami beli baju supaya boleh matching...dalam byk2 tahun, inilah tahun pertama kami sedondon utk raya. namun perasaan gembira itu tetap disulam dengan perasaan hiba kerana tahun ini, saya sudah kehilangan tiga org penting dalam hidup saya iaitu nenek saya, ayah mertua dan akhir sekali, makcik saya. pemergian makcik saya merupakan kemuncak peristiwa bagi tahun ini (walaupun sebenarnya byk lagi kemuncak cerita utk tahun ini dgn kisah2 gempa bumi, bencana alam etc di seluruh dunia).... tahun ini juga saya beraya selama seminggu di terengganu....sebelum2 nih, susah nak dpt cuti raya disbbkan oncall etc.sehingga kini, saya masih terkenang2kan arwah makcik saya...dan tidak lupa juga wajah arwah mak saya.

setiap hari saya memandu pergi balik kerja, saya merasakan alangkan seronoknya sekiranya arwah mak saya masih ada utk melihat apa yg saya ada saat ini. keluarga sendiri, anak2 saya membesar dengan sihat, saya dah jadi MO dan boleh bawak kereta merata2. ianya merupakan impian arwah mak saya. saya terbayangkan seronoknya sekiranya saya boleh membawa mak saya berjalan2 dengan kereta saya. walaupun pd asalnya saya takut membawa kereta dan pd ketika itu juga, arwah mak tidak menggalakkan saya membawa kereta sehinggalah saya dah HO, baru arwah mak bising suruh saya berjinak2 kembali membawa kereta. setiap kali kembali dr kerja, ketika saya melalui bandar seremban, saya juga  teringat akan arwah makcik saya. apabila saya encounter dengan kes2 asma (asthma) yg sukar dikawal di klinik asma (buat masa ni, saya yg menerajui klinik asma di KK saya), terasa teringin bertanyakan kpd makcik saya...disitulah terasanya kehilangan makcik saya  yg merupakan seorang paediatric respiratory physician.

sekarang, saya rasa sangat stress dengan kerja2 harian, terasa nak pergi holiday, nak lari dr semua hiruk pikuk kehidupan yg rutin ini. tak sabar2 nak menunggu masa tu tp bila ya????

sekarang juga, suami saya baru mendaftar utk master di Uniten, jadi byk masanya diluangkan utk ke kelas dan assigment. kadang2 boring juga saya dibuatnya..hmm...mmg taklah boring sgt bila ada anak2 di sini, tp tak lengkap kalau tak ada cik abang. rasa mcm nak buat sesuatu juga utk diri sendiri, saya ada dua benda dalam kepala, nak gardening...dan nak exercise. bab gardening tu saya teringin nak tanam pokok bunga tp tak tau nak tanam pokok bunga apa dan nak cari nursery kat mana. bab exercise tuh pon satu, teringin nak pergi gym, join kelas2 aerobik ke...tp bila nak buat nya? masanya???

oklah, dah habis berceloteh dan membuat ringkasan utk dua bulan lepas. nanti saya letak lah gambar baju yg saya jahit....menunjukkan bakat yg tak seberapa tu.....

her last say

in her blog.....http://shidmikegambit.blogspot.com/

How to supervise HO or junior doctors - my perspective

We have heard about story about competency of doctors nowadays especially HO. As HOD, I can see a lot of differences between HOs today and HOs many years back. I think there are various factors involved that make that differences. I can list down a few factors that I think are relevant for the differences.

a. Many years ago, there were only a few established local universities were recognised to train medical students with enough lectures and facilities. Selected students will be sent overseas to study medicine in recognised universities. But now, anyone can go to any universities for political reasons even to the unrecognised universities. We are now looking more towards numbers rather than qualities. We can't really blame the students for not performing sometimes. When you asked them, they said that they didn't have any exposure in certain disciplines. Lectures used to be cancelled many times due to many reasons. Sometimes they have to learn on their own without guidance. They learned from videos rather than real patients. Well, technology does play an important role in learning but to become a doctor I feel that we have to learn from a real patients.

b. I agree that we need changes in life or education system if the need is there. But don't make those changes for the sake of making changes or based on political pressure. When we politicised education, it will bring the whole system down. If the education system is almost perfect to produce good doctors why we have to change to a terrible one. If the changes needed, it should be done slowly and not abruptly. The education system keep on changing before you can see the outcome from the previous changes. When the minister change, the system change regardless how good the system is. I felt that the new medical education system is making the medical students more a follower and memorizer rather than having a critical and analytical thinking process. Their way of thinking is very compartmentalised rather than generalised. Intergrated system doesn't seem to help them in connecting their knowledge toward disease and patient as a whole.

c. Student factors. There are two extreme conditions. Those who got 4 flat during exam, all of them wanted to become a doctor even though they have no interest. Sometimes they are being forced by their parents. The parents dictate what their children need. Those who didn't get 4 flat but wanted to be a doctor badly have to go to the other universities in overseas where the training was terrible. There were another group of students who are second grader, badly wanted to be a doctor, went to the cheapest and affordable universities abroad under their parents scholarship and manage to go through the medical school with difficulty. Another group of students from the private universities whom their parents are well to do and not on any scholarship, don't really bother what's going on. Social background also play an important factor in determining the product of the good doctors. Mental, physical and innerself strength are important for the medical students to have because as a doctor, stress is part of our life. From my observation, our junior doctors are very weak and fragile on top of having lack of knowledge and attitude problems.

HOs many years ago easily can be trained, most of them. There were faster learner. They can stand alone after one month of initial training. They were more proactive and ever willing to learn. No questions asked. There will be no parents or politician interference. Rarely you hear that consultants or specialists being threatened by parents for teaching their children to become a good doctors. Now it become fairly routine. Yesteryears HOs were more polite and respect their seniors and superiors. Again I must say most of them. Therefore, one year HO training is adequate for them to be a safe doctors. They managed to handle many patients at one time. At the end of their housemanship, you will be able to see their maturation and competency. Now, the HO training is extended to 2 years duration. They have to go through all the disciplines in medicine before they can go out and practice on their own. Some of them need more than 2 years. There are so many of them, out numbers the patients. They come from various universities that you never heard before. 2 patients under their care, they can't even remember.

I attended a few motivational talk given by well known motivators talking about how to train the HOs. Look who is talking. I just smile to myself. Most of these motivators, they have left the government service long time ago and they don't really have the experience of training the new breed of HOs the way I and my friends do. It is very tough. The things that they do, the mistake that they have done are beyond our imagination. "Bodoh sombong pun ada". Sometimes you really have to go into the basic of medicine as if you are teaching the third year medical students. Attitude problems another one to handle. The worse thing is, went they make mistake they have no regrets. No guilty feeling. Caring is not in their vocab. Politeness is too far to practice. Some of them have no insight. For me, if the young doctors are incompetent and willing to learn, I will go all out to teach them and make them competent. It is my responsibility to ensure they are safe and the patients are safe as well. I am willing to take that challenge and I will do it my own way. You have to be firm and consistent. As a teacher or supervisor to these junior doctors, our aim is to make sure that the quality of medical services are up to the standard. If your are fast learner, you will leave my department on schedule but if you are slow learner, you will be with us till you learned. I don't really care what people say.