For Part I, click HERE
Maintaining Wife and Raising Children
The treatment of the wife and children is a determining factor on the Day of Judgment that can tip the scale. Thus, they have rights that must be properly maintained, cared for and given priority. If the home is not providing a positive spiritual environment for the wife and children, then this will harm the entire family.
Narrated `Abdullah bin `Umar : The Prophet said, “Everyone of you is a guardian and everyone of you is responsible (for his wards). A ruler is a guardian and is responsible(for his subjects); a man is a guardian of his family and responsible (for them); a wife is a guardian of her husband’s house and she is responsible (for it), a slave is a guardian of his master’s property and is responsible (for that). Beware! All of you are guardians and are responsible (for your wards).
Abu Sa’id narrated, ‘Zainab, the wife of Ibn Mas’ud came along and said to the Prophet “O Messenger of Allah ! You have commanded us today to give Sadaqah (charity). I have some jewelry of mine and I wanted to give it as Sadaqah, but Ibn Mas’ud claims that he and his children are the most entitled to my Sadaqah. (deserve it more than anyone else.)’ The Messenger of Allah said: “Ibn Mas’ud is right. Your husband and your children are more deserving.’’ Related by Al-Bukhari.
Removing Extravagant Indulgences of the World
Things like gold and silver utensils, and silk clothing are indulgences which are not befitting of us to have for this world but these things are for the hereafter. Even the wrong type of music, television and/or video games can very much pollute and harm the environment of a home. Wasting time, focusing on excessive materialism and competing in worldly matters that are prohibited takes our focus away from competing in good deeds for the hereafter.
It was narrated that Hudhaifah said: “The Messenger of Allah forbade drinking from vessels of gold and silver. He said: “They are for them in this world and for you in the Hereafter.’” – Sunan Ibn Majah
“Then you will surely be asked that Day about pleasure.” – (At-Takathur 102:8)
Cleanliness is a clear part of Islam without which our prayers are not accepted, the punishment of the grave becomes a serious risk and our physical and spiritual health will be degraded.
Abu Malik at-Ash’ari reported: The Messenger of Allah said: Cleanliness is half of faith and al-Hamdu Liliah (Praise be to Allah) fills the scale, and Subhan Allah (Glory be to Allah) and al-Hamdu Liliah (Praise be to Allah) fill up what is between the heavens and the earth, and prayer is a light, and charity is proof (of one’s faith) and endurance is a brightness and the Holy Qur’an is a proof on your behalf or against you. All men go out early in the morning and sell themselves, thereby setting themselves free or destroying themselves.1 – Muslim 223
Functionality Especially in Terms of Safety and Privacy
The Quran itself makes mention of the safety of a home and thus, it is a priority especially in terms of the construction. Privacy is also emphasized as it is a great part of the etiquette of the home, when it comes to women and children, and the various functions of the entryway, living room, the kitchen, the bedroom and the bathroom. The functionality should be maximized with safety and privacy being the foremost guiding principles followed by utilizing the home in a way to avoid waste.
“Then is one who laid the foundation of his building on righteousness [with fear] from Allah and [seeking] His approval better or one who laid the foundation of his building on the edge of a bank about to collapse, so it collapsed with him into the fire of Hell? And Allah does not guide the wrongdoing people.” – (At-Tawbah 9:109).Narrated Jabir : “The Messenger of Allah prohibited that a man sleep on a terrace without something to obstruct him (so that he will not roll off and fall).” – Tirmidhi
Striving for Perfection
The home is a place to be perfected so that its maintenance can be an act of worship and more good deeds will hopefully come from it by not being distracted or bogged down with unimportant things.
It needs to make us productive so we can make it our basis for being firm in the path of Allah .
Abu Sa’id (Al Khudri) reported The Prophet was asked “Which believers are most perfect in respect of faith? He replied “A man who strives in the path of Allah with his life and property and a man who worships Allah in a mountain valley where he protects the people from his evil.””- Abu Dawud.
The Islamic home requires a moderate balance and a spiritual feel to ward off Shaitan-the rejected, and to promote a positive, productive, stable, spiritual, intellectual and focused atmosphere. Modern electronic devices such as televisions, gaming systems, computers, radios and the like must currently be very constrained to the few good uses when most of what can come through them would be otherwise totally materialistic and send un-Islamic messages. The home is not a place for laziness, indulgence, sinning in secret, wasting time or foul acts.
The home must be a place of worship, a classroom, a place of taking care of the necessities of life, a place of close family relationships, a place for rest, a place for work, a place for drawing near to Allah even when no one else can see, a place of thinking, a place of upbringing steadfast and upright Muslim children. The home is the place we always return to in this world while the hereafter is the place we will certainly return to, after our death. Thus, it is a temporary resting place for us given as sustenance from Allah which we should use to prepare for the final resting place to come.
In the future, the manners and etiquette along with the specific details of each part of the home will be analyzed as well as some tools that would make excellent reminders (especially for those who don’t have access to sufficient authentic knowledge) to maximize their nearness to Allah through dua’a and actions in accordance with the Sunnah.
May Allah grant homes filled with blessings and mercy to all those who seek His favor. Ameen